Thorn in the Flesh

The series To The Cor just wrapped up in my homechurch UBC (University Baptist Church) and man, it ended with a bang. I honestly think this was one of the best series I’ve ever had the privilege of listening to. And if you’re in any way going through the fire of trials right now, I seriously urge you to check this series out. You can catch the sermon videos/podcast here.

The sermon today hit right to the core (every pun intended) when it talked about thorn in the flesh and God’s grace being enough. I suddenly remembered the entry I wrote last June. Thought of sharing with you guys my experience. And if you’re going through the same thing, take comfort in the truth that you are not alone.

***Posted June 15, 2011

I asked God today “If You want to bless us when we follow You, why then is Christian life so difficult?” I thought about all the years I was a Christian and now that I’m spiritually growing and maturing in Christ, I’ve never been more discouraged, I’ve never experienced more pain, I’ve never felt more lonely, I’ve never been hurt more than all those years combined. I was almost saying “What’s up with that God?”

I was driving through I-95 when Come Thou Fount came on the radio. I just found myself bawling. And then I heard that still small voice I’ve come to know.

I’m breaking you into pieces, Jamie… so that I can build you back up again into someone who would be useful for My purpose.

Then He tells me, “look back in the past few months. You have served Me more than your past few years. And the results are exponential even if you don’t see it yet. The pain you’re feeling right now, that thorn in the flesh, is the very same thing that is propelling you to give yourself more to Me.”

And He’s right. I found myself replying, “Well then, here Lord. Take the pieces. Because I can’t deal with this on my own anymore. Sustain me each week by Your grace. I know that You see the times when I would just like to throw in the towel. Heck, You know I was half wishing for the rapture to be true last May so I can get out of this place. But I wouldn’t. Not until You tell me to.”